The student news site of Solon High School

The SHS Courier

The SHS Courier

The SHS Courier

Join the Courier Mailing List
Get the latest updates delivered directly to your inbox.
We respect your privacy.

I would rather bleach all my hair than listen to Bleachers new album again

Bleachers album cover on Target shelves.
“Bleachers” album cover on Target shelves.

Bleachers has just released their self-titled fourth studio album “Bleachers,” and honestly it’s a letdown. Jack Antonoff, Bleachers lead singer, has produced some of the best pop albums of the last two decades including albums by Taylor Swift, Lana Del Rey and Lorde. But still, he can’t seem to find any mainstream success with his own band.

“Bleachers” opens up with the song “I Am Right On Time” with a soft instrumental backing and then leads to Jack Antonoff mumbling through the lyrics. The lyrics try to give off a nostalgic tone with the line “The future’s past / I’m right on time.” The lyric “Now I’m a child again” comes after, which is so overdone. So many other artists including Mitski in “First Love/Late Spring” have made songs with the exact same line. The rest of the song is pretty generic, nothing really sticks out to me, much like most of the album.

The album then quickly speeds up to a fun, brighter song called “Modern Girl.” The song tells the story of a group of boys going out on the town. Antonoff’s vocals are so much better in this song, you can really see his talent which was very limited in the previous song. I love the chorus– it’s very catchy. The lyrics “So kiss me on the cheek / Make it a long goodbye” are so fun ,and I genuinely enjoyed listening to it.

One standout on the album is “Call Me After Midnight.” The song features Sam Dew as a singer and really makes the song so much better. Instead of Antonoff’s regular monotone, mumbly voice, Dew adds a new, much needed layer to the song. If they added Dew to any of the other songs on the album, I think it would have improved it a lot.

In “Modern Girl” the band’s talent really shines through, and it’s disappointing they didn’t take their album in that direction. The rest of the songs on “Bleachers” are somber and the lyrics are emotionally generic.

The song “Jesus is Dead” is one of the most pretentious, lyrically boring songs I have ever heard. The line “Jesus is dead / And so’s New York” is something a 12 year old would write back on Tumblr in 2014 while trying to be ‘deep.’ The entire song is so monotone, and the lyrics make no sense. No idea what Antonoff is trying to say, what the subject of the song is, or anything else. The entire song sounds like they mashed 10 random strings of lyrics together in a song generator and this was the result.

A majority of the rest of the songs on the album are similar to the prior. Lyrically boring, bad instrumentals, trying to be ‘deep’ while also saying nothing. Every single song sounds exactly the same.

In previous albums such as “Strange Desire” and “Gone Now” their sound is much brighter and much more enjoyable. The direction they’ve taken their band in recent years is disappointing. It started with “Take the Sadness Out of Saturday Night” in 2021, and their songs have become so much more homogeneous since then.

Overall, “Bleachers” was really nothing special. I honestly had nothing to say about songs like “Isimo” or “Hey Joe,” most of the album was just really bland. I think for mainstream success like Antonoff has had with his producing talents, the band needs to take their sound in the direction of “Modern Girl” and “Call Me After Midnight.” Lyrically, these songs are nothing special. But soundwise, they really stand out. I think Bleachers has potential, but they need to stop making boring, trying-to-be emo songs. That does nothing for Antonoff or the rest of the band. It only really limits their talent.

Leave a Comment
More to Discover

Comments (0)

All The SHS Courier Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *